As Ian slid down his briefs he could see the shock on my face. He smirked, but blushed a little, too: “So, you like it then, mate?”
I did. But that’s not why I was staring at it slack-jawed. I’d been checking him out for weeks, stealing glances—some furtive, some not—at his crotch as we tried to feel each other out, tried to see where exactly this “show the new postdoc from England around campus” task foisted on me by my adviser would go. And in all that time I’d never seen evidence that he was hung like this. Even when he’d shucked off his pants a minute ago the bulge in his briefs had been a bulge, yeah, but not like this. How did he even manage to fit that thing in his underwear? No, I’m a physicist, and I just literally don’t get how the hell that works. Are his briefs “bigger on the inside?” Like a TARDIS or something? Or Mary Poppins’ bag? Or the Weasleys’ borrowed tent?
I dunno. Maybe it’s a British thing.
LIKE A TARDIS OR SOMETHING!!!!!!
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Major Dad’s video favourite 177Fucking love what he does with his foreskin!
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Spy on dicks… with no risk of being caught!Nice specimen
MAGNUM, P. I.
So I was curious. A little while ago, a female tumblrer I follow posted a picture of a handbag, containing a couple gold foil Trojan Magnum condoms (the implication being, “you must be at least this size to go on this ride”) and I thought it was one of the naughtiest and sexiest pictures I’ve seen here on tumblr. Now of course there is an obviously stereotypical, yet still widely accepted, image of the “average” Magnum user - and if you’ll allow me to deftly circumvent piling on the stereotype, let me just say I don’t really look the part. I think we understand each other. But still I was curious.
I’ve never actually used condoms all that much, being more a serial monogamist than some kind of player. The women I’ve been with have, for the most part, done me the immense favor of taking care of the birth control, and then followed that up with the even more immense favor of wanting to experience my cum in every way possible. But still, there have been times when I’ve had to bag it up, for whatever reason, and I’ve often found the traditional condom to be problematic, too tight, confining, and uncooperative with my foreskin. I took to putting a little lube inside the tip of the condom before putting it on, just to allow the head of my penis some wiggle room. Was the solution a bigger condom? Was I overestimating myself? Would a Magnum slip off like a sock on a twig? Only one way to find out!
So I picked up a small package of large condoms, actually getting Magnum XL’s by accident, when all I wanted to try were the regular Magnums. Still, no going back now. On the count of three, unsheath your churros!!! And this photoset is the result. …So, altogether not too bad. As anticipated, I don’t fill up the entire length, but my girth is accommodated nicely. I’m not swimming in it, but neither am I threatening to burst it wide open. And that’s actually a good thing; while the base is nice and tight and snug, the foreskin and head of my penis is liberated, free to swell up and slide around to its glans’s content, leaving plenty of room for the inevitable liquid explosion. There’s unfortunately probably a little too much extra loose latex for anal sex, but I think my sensations during vaginal sex would actually be enhanced. All in all, a pleasant surprise - and honestly, I could get used to this.
All that kept going through my head (the one on my shoulders) is that line from The Simpsons Movie, where Comic Book Guy comments on wearing Marge’s pregnancy pants, “I’ve never known comfort like this!”
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